5765, Rosh Hashannah, Firestone
Rosh HaShanah 5765
16 September 2004 / 1 Tishrei 5765
Simon Firestone
Rosh HaShannah is the easiest holiday as far as the body is concerned. All the others have some kind of physical torment associated with them. We fast on Yom Kippur, get upset stomachs from Matzah on Pesach, stay up late on Shavuot, or move the dining room outside on Sukkot. On R'H we do some extra prayers and hear the shofar. Oh yeah and eat honey. It's a piece of cake!
I think we get a bit of a freebie on this holiday because it's central theme, G-d's sovereignty, is so abstract. We can think about it or feel it, but any extra intense activity like scrubbing pots would be a distraction. I want to offer up some help in the subtle task posed by this awesome day.
What's your relationship like with G-d today? Take a moment. It may be hard to be sincere or even get started. I want to suggest three ways to approach this question and hope at least one of them might be helpful over these ten sacred days between now and Yom Kippur. I label these three ways with questions. The first is "What do I want?" The second one is: "What do you mean, I don't get what I want?" The last is "Whatever you want." I'm going to call on three Bible stories related to our Moabite cousins for help. The stories are Lot's daughters, Balaam the prophet, and Ruth.
One model is Lot's daughters. Lot was Abraham's nephew, and had the misfortune of living in Sodom when G-d decided to destroy it. Only Lot and his two daughters were saved. The daughters lost hope of marriage either because they thought the whole world was destroyed or because they believed that nobody would want to be with someone from such a terrible city. They REALLY wanted to have children. So they got their father drunk and got pregnant from him. The oldest daughter was so proud of her solution that she named the child Moav, which means what in Hebrew? Anyone?
I don't hold up Lot's daughters as a role model for obvious reasons. However, I respect their ability to define really clearly what they wanted. This kind of clarity can be helpful if we have trouble even getting started thinking about our relationship with G-d. The question "What do I want?" might be a good place to begin. A really important part of making any relationship work is taking some time for yourself outside of it to determine your needs. Any relationship where you are just giving and not receiving anything is unhealthy. So an important part of your relationship with G-d is to figure out what you want from G-d. When you are praying for a good year, what would that year look like? What special part of you needs more inspiration or attention from the divine. How do you want to change? How do you want the world to change? Coming up with a wish list is a great way to start your conversation with G-d.
The prophet Balaam illustrates a different way of approaching G-d. Balaam worked closely with the descendents of Lot's daughters generations later, when Israel was busy conquering the East Bank of the Jordan under Moses' leadership. Lot's son (who also happens to be his grandson -- who else saw Chinatown?) Moav spawned a kingdom, also named Moav. The king of the nation Moav saw Israel wreaking havoc all around and got nervous. He hired the well known prophet Balaam as a sort of equalizer to curse Israel before they could go to war. While Balaam professed to be a mere vessel for divine prophecy, the story makes it clear that he clearly wanted the reward that can come from a successful curse. There's a weird sort of passive aggressive dance between G-d and Balaam, in which he repeatedly insists that he will do whatever G-d wants while trying to curse Israel again and again. G-d made it clear that there will be no curse but let Balaam keep trying. While Balaam finally blessed Israel instead, the bulk of the story is this odd back and forth.
I think Balaam's struggle with G-d shows another way of opening up a conversation with G-d today. Some of us may have a clear an idea of what we want, but just aren't getting there. We may find the way blocked by forces outside ourselves. How many times have you said, "If only X and Y would happen, I'd be content." How many times do you get your way only to find that it doesn't work out, that other problems just pop up instead? Consider any struggles that you are going through right now, any frustrations that you are feeling. Try asking G-d why you aren't getting where you want to go. Balaam kept pushing rather than giving up, and was rewarded by saying words that some Jews recite every time they walk into a synagogue. Reflecting a bit about whatever struggle you are engaged in might not get you where you want but could take you somewhere unexpected and good.
Balaam pushed for what he wanted, but then let go of it. Generations later, a Moabite woman named Ruth took an opposite approach to her relationship with G-d: surrender. Ruth married a Jewish immigrant to Moav during the time of the Judges, centuries after Balaam. Israel was already settled into its homeland, but due to a famine some Jews emigrated. Ruth's husband died, and her mother-in-law, who had followed her son, decided to return to Israel after the funeral. Ruth followed her mother-in-law even though her legal obligations to the Jewish people died with her husband. She famously declared when her mother-in-law tried to shoo her away, "Wherever you go, I will go. Where you sleep, I will sleep. Your people will be my people, and your G-d my G-d. Where you die, I will die and there I will be buried. Thus and more may the Lord do to me if anything but death parts me from you." The Rabbis took this declaration of fealty to be the ultimate moment of conversion, and found evidence in her name. They note that the numerical value of Ruth in Hebrew is 606. If you add the 7 commandments which all Gentiles share with the Jews, to 606, what do you get? That's right.
Imagine making such a declaration of surrender to G-d. Picture yourself saying "Whatever you want, I will do." These moments are rare, and depending on what we think G-d is saying to us, can actually be really dangerous. But there is also real room for growth and humility that can come from letting go of your self. I think many of us in the Conservative movement come closest to this moment on Yom Kippur, when we abstain from our basic needs like eating, drinking and bathing, putting aside our own comfort for a bit longer than a day. It's hard but there's something so exhilarating about making it to the end. Imagine if we could put aside ourselves that way to heal the world more often. According to last month's New York Times, people spent 3.1 billion dollars last year on customized cell phone rings. Imagine what else could be done with that money rather than making a special tune play when your uncle calls. I think we can all let go of some of the extraneous matter in our lives, and give over that time or resources to G-d, even if it doesn't come naturally. While few of us can achieve the level of Ruth's surrender all day every day, we could all get a little closer to her.
I've suggested three ways to approach G-d this season. Lot's daughters teach us about defining what we need. Balaam, who was hired by their descendents, illustrates reflection on frustrated desire. Ruth, centuries later, shows us what it's like to surrender. A famous irony is that King David and therefore the Jewish Messiah are descendents of Ruth, and thus of the embarrassing liaison between Lot and his daughters. -- The lesson is that we never know where redemption can come from. I bless us that wherever we are in our relationship with G-d, we can make the relationship deeper and stronger this season.
Shana Tovah.